i wish i never found out. but now that i do know, i have no idea what to make of it. of course i was devastated when i first heard about it — tears fell freely last saturday. but now, i feel… nothing. oh, i still think about it, and i still wish that it didn’t happen to us, but i don’t feel as betrayed or angry anymore. it’s as if i zoomed into the acceptance stage. or maybe i’m still in denial. or maybe i was waiting for something like this to happen that i’ve become desentisized after getting over the first shock. *sigh* let’s just hope everything will turn out okay.